Almost Lover
by I am Sky daughter of Zeus
Summary: Songfic about Firestar and Cinderpelt. Cinderpelt loved Firestar, wanted to be mates with him, but a simple, ambitious cat took that away from her... do not own song or Warriors.


**Haii! I'm back again with my first songfic, about Cinderpelt and Firestar! I know, I know, Firestar and Sandstorm were meant to be, but NEWSFLASH! Sandstorm wasn't the only one who liked Firestar! Cinderpelt had a crush on him since she was an apprentice, so I find that quite sad that she never got a happy ending...so here it is!**

* * *

_"Your fingertips across my skin,_

_The palm trees swaying in the wind," _

* * *

_I felt your paws brush my flank, even through the immense pain burning on my hind leg. Your scent wreathed around me, smothering the disgusting scent of the Thunderpath, the hard black stone numbing the rest of my body. A dark brown tabby~Tigerclaw?~was behind him, unusually quiet. _

_My breath came in short, quick gasps as I felt teeth pinch my scruff as I was lifted into the air. Anxious green eyes peered into mine, and my heart thumped unnaturally fast. _

_"You'll be fine, Cinderpaw. We're going to get you to Yellowfang now," Fireheart whispered._

_I didn't believe him._

* * *

_"You sang me Spanish lullibies,_

_The sweetest sadness in your eyes," _

* * *

_You came to visit me every night in the medicine cat's den. To talk with me. To care for me, but all with an air of sadness that could be understood. My leg was broken, thanks to a monster on the Thunderpath. I could never be a warrior, run as freely as any other cat could, feel the feeling of victory after a battle. _

_And, every night, when you had to leave, you padded over to the warriors' den, while I stared after you._

_You never looked back. _

* * *

_"Well, I never want to see you unhappy,_

_I thought you'd want the same for me,"_

* * *

_It was pity that made me tell you. Your cluelessness pushed me to do that. While you told me about the omen from Spottedleaf, I cut in._

_"Fireheart," I stated, "You need to stop thinking of the past and dead cats. While you're thinking of Spottedleaf, there's another cat~a _living_ one~that is thinking of _you_." _

_You blinked~it was clear you were baffled, so I sighed. "Fireheart, every cat in the Clan can see that Sandstorm really, really likes you!" _

_You stuttered for a moment, then blinked at this newfound knowledge. "Sandstorm?" you mumbled, half to yourself. _

_As you left, I prayed that I just didn't lose you to the cat I just helped._

* * *

_"Goodbye, my almost lover._

_Goodbye, my hopeless dream. _

_I'm trying not to think of you,_

_Can't you just let me be?" _

* * *

_I tried not to tremble and tried not to think of you as I watched Bluestar announce that Yellowfang was dead. _

_I was now the full medicine cat of ThunderClan. _

_I was a medicine cat...and medicine cats couldn't take mates. All my small flutters of hope, all my small jumps of excitement everytime you purred at me~it didn't matter anymore. I couldn't take you as a mate, nor could I ever have kits of my own, as I had always dreamed of. _

_And the biggest contraction~you didn't love me. You loved Sandstorm, and Sandstorm loved you back. I could see your future, Sandstorm raising your kits, and you as leader of ThunderClan, with a nice and loyal deputy. There was no me in it. Maybe I was the trustworthy medicine cat, and maybe that was enough, I told myself._

_Right?_

* * *

_"So long, my luckless romance,_

_My back is turned on you._

_Should've known you'd bring me heartache._

_Almost lovers always do."_

* * *

_You're a father of two beautiful kits now. Always we have been the best of friends. Nothing more. You were the leader of ThunderClan, with many lives stretching out of you. I was simply your trusted medicine cat. _

_Though, every night, I would lie on my nest of moss and ponder how it would've been like if I wasn't hit by that monster. I could've been your mate. I could've been the queen nursing my two kits, instead of Sandstorm. _

_But, no. I turned my back on you to face my duties as a medicine cat, even though it ripped my heart in two to do so. My heart hurt everytime you and Sandstorm were together. We were almost lovers, but something changed us, and I was pulled from your heart. Forever._

* * *

_"We walked along a crowded street,_

_You took my hand and danced with me," _

* * *

_A lot of things happened during the timespan, but I clearly remembered one thing when we were young, when we stayed at the old forest, when your daughter, Leafpool, wasn't in love with the WindClan cat, Crowfeather._

_You twined your tail in mine and we played games, chasing one another, not needing to worry if my leg would hold, and not worrying how Sandstorm would feel if she saw us. _

_Our fun was cut short when a hunting patrol crossed us, and we were forced to help hunt. Little did I know that that was going to be my last hunting expedition. _

_And now I am among my last days. I don't know what to do. I am going to die, in the claws of a badger, and Leafpool is clearly madly in love with Crowfeather. I don't know which Clan she would choose if she had to._

_And you~the only thing that makes me anxious about leaving ThunderClan. I would have to wait, because of your prolonged lives, before I could see you in StarClan. All these moons, you never noticed a thing. You never realized that I, too, loved you._

* * *

_"And when you left, you kissed my lips,_

_You told me you'd never, never forget,_

_These images..." _

* * *

_And, during our fun, when mentor and apprentice had to part, you playfully nudged me and said, "I'll never forget the fun we had. Let's do it sometime else, shall we?" I had practically bounced with eagerness, thinking that things might finally be going my way. _

_But I was wrong. _

_I think of then and now, surrounded by howling badgers, sitting beside a terrified Sorreltail, thinking of my hopeless love. Oh, Firestar, I'm sorry. I'm sorry we never had the future we could've had. And, most of all, I'm sorry I never told you I loved you. _

_I'm surprisingly calm, and I can see the badger entering from a hole in the nursery. This badger will be the death of me, but, at first, it ignores me, going instead for the much-plumper Sorreltail, still slightly swollen even while kitting._

_"You will not harm her!" I snarled, leaping to what would be my death..._

* * *

_"Goodbye, my almost lover._

_Goodbye, my hopeless dream._

_I'm trying not to think of you._

_Can't you just let me be?_

* * *

**Gud...I almost cried while writing this songfic. Poor, poor Cinderpelt never got her happy ending. So, I guess you'd like to review? *hopeful face***

**-Sky**


End file.
